Short Cat Puke and Hairball Stories Part 2

In this section we would like to have stories (of the humorous or not so humorous type) about cats throwing up!

If you have a good story you would like to contribute - please see our Contact page and send it in!

2001 - It could be worse!
With 11 eleven in-door cats, puke IS part of our lives. Best part of cat puke.... if you're walking barefoot in the dark; you're grateful you stepped in puke!!

2001 - Cat puke alarm clocks!
There is nothing quite like a hairball puke under the sheets with you! I know. Does wonders for your ability to wake up instantly and change the bedding.

2001 - Puke everywhere
I had this Aunt, Elsie, who had a houseful of cats who would poop and puke all over the place, and instead of cleaning it up, she would throw a few newspapers over the accident. Later, she would buy an expensive oriental rug for kitty to mess all over. Well one time, Aunty Elsie went to a casino, and left me with Smoker, her four year old cat. He puked all over my TV, all over my couch and managed to puke in my car! I was in a hurry to the phone once when all of a sudden I felt something warm and slimy on my new rug. 'Catmess!' I screamed, and let kitty tough it out for a few days on my porch. I rushed to the door, Smoker in hand, when Elsie returned!

2001 - We are not alone.
My cats eat that Salmon stuff that make your cats puke. It makes one of mine, Nicholas barf too. YOUR NOT ALONE!

2001 - Puke shampoo?
I woke up one morning, headed downstairs, but kept smelling something funny. What is that smell??? Used the bathroom, washed my hands, looked in the mirror and screamed! The cat had puked right on top of my head during the night. Last time she slept with me. I started closing the door after that one.

5/29/01 - All over husband
One day about four years ago my husband and I were sitting on the couch petting my fabulous white feline, Gris-Gris. She was purring like mad until suddenly, HACK, she puked all over my husband! He isn't good with bodily fluids and had to run into the bathroom, hand over mouth trying to staunch his own flow. Gris-Gris was not amused at his antics!

5/24/01 - Rocky strikes again!
My husband and I got rid of the kids for the night. You know, a little dinner, a movie, no kids after 6 years of marriage and VOILA! Rocky had struck again! Just to leave his prize first thing in the morning. At one end of the rug - just at the bottom of the stairs I might add - a tail, two hind feet and the spine of some poor thing, then a trail of puke to the other end of the rug to the, ALAS, the head! So yummy to wake up and see that! And to think we got a sitter to get that view! The worst part, we don't have a dog to clean up after us. We are seriously considering getting one - they clean up better than Hoovers after the kids and the cheerios and we all know how they clean up after our kitties! Till next time, and I am sure there will be.....

5/11/01 - First Hairball Experience!
I have had my lovely cat Onyx for about six months now, after she found me at a friend's house and, previously being antisocial, jumped on my shoulder, purred, and wouldn't leave. She had never puked before, ever, and this being my first cat, I had no idea what a hairball looked like. Yuck! She began making long drawn out meowing noises and hacking, walked a few paces, puked up something atrocious, walked a bit more, puked again. The hairball looked like some kind of larva or a piece of slimy stool. I thought she was sick and I was terribly worried. My friend laughed at me and told me it was nothing but a hairball, a huge hairball, but just a hairball. I was quite relieved and I still feel a tad silly for overreacting. Toodles!

5/1/01 - The quiet one puked up mouse guts.
Ok, so this happened a while ago, but definitely worth repeating to fellow cat-people. Our very timid, shy kitty named "Rocky" has turned out to be our killer when we moved one street over. Now our kitties don't go outside and right after we moved, there have been dead mice and chipmunks left as presents. Couldn't be quiet Rocky. Oh no. But, right after giving birth to my second child, alone, with no man around during the day, Rocky decides to have that sound that we all know- HACK!!! And voila!! Mouse guts!! It has been Rocky all along killing these little boogers and now I have proof! Oh, but alas, I have proof with small toddling children and no guy to clean it up! I HAVE TO DO IT MYSELF. Egads. I mean, isn't why you get married? To have him take out the garbage, kill the spiders, and then get rid of certain unmentionable stuff? Isn't that what they are for? I had only moments to think; I called him to have him come home to take care of this terrible science experiment but I still have kids walking around- who also started getting curious about that "lump-o-stuff". I HAD TO DO IT MYSELF. A few rolls of paper towels could never be enough of a buffer- so, gulp, i just did it. I saved my kids from whatever, discovered my sweet, timid cat was a killer- who doesn't digest his kill that well, and that, YES, I, A WOMAN COULD DO IT BY MYSELF!!!

Gross but absolutely true.

Short cat puke stories part 3